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How to speak Fifa

A user’s guide to interpreting global football chief Gianni Infantino’s most inspirational thoughts
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{"text":[[{"start":4.8,"text":"It’s a huge month for football fans. But could some of them spare a thought for the World Cup’s tireless organiser-in-chief — Gianni Infantino, head of Fifa?  "}],[{"start":15.05,"text":"Infantino speaks many languages. He seems to feel misunderstood in all of them. “I don’t understand . . . why some of you are so mean,” he once told journalists."}],[{"start":25.6,"text":"On the eve of the last World Cup in Qatar, Infantino announced: “Today I feel gay. Today I feel disabled. Today I feel a migrant worker.” This week, he told people to “chill, relax” after the US banned a respected Somali referee from entering the country. "}],[{"start":43.45,"text":"Clearly something is lost in translation. To help mutual understanding, the FT is happy to interpret some of Infantino’s most inspirational thoughts."}],[{"start":52.900000000000006,"text":"This is the most inclusive World Cup ever. You have Cape Verde in the office sweepstake."}],[{"start":58.400000000000006,"text":"Let’s take the politics out of football. Do you have to publish photos of me laughing with Vladimir Putin?  "}],[{"start":63.75000000000001,"text":"This World Cup is already breaking records. No football fan has previously paid $18 for a beer."}],[{"start":71.10000000000001,"text":"It would have been impossible to organise this tournament without President Donald Trump. Finally, a host nation that makes Qatar’s record on migrant workers look acceptable."}],[{"start":82.45,"text":"We are confronted with some challenges that we would rather not be confronted with. I have to do one press conference."}],[{"start":89.60000000000001,"text":"Fifa and football cannot solve all problems. I will not be visiting you in ICE detention. "}],[{"start":95.25000000000001,"text":"This is the biggest event probably in the history of mankind. Growing up in a humble family in Switzerland, I skipped all history classes."}],[{"start":103.20000000000002,"text":"The fans make the World Cup what it is. I couldn’t travel by private jet without you."}],[{"start":108.60000000000002,"text":"I am genuinely very excited to watch all 48 nations. It’s all relative: I sat through the Melania documentary. "}],[{"start":116.60000000000002,"text":"Unlike some, we don’t sell our broadcast rights to pay-TV. Every night, I dream about selling broadcast rights to pay-TV."}],[{"start":124.85000000000002,"text":"Every dollar that Fifa generates goes back into football. My definition of football includes renting an office in Trump Tower. "}],[{"start":132.50000000000003,"text":"The World Cup is a once-in-a-lifetime event. Go to this tournament, and you’ll never be able to afford to travel again."}],[{"start":139.20000000000002,"text":"Democracy is not just an empty word. At Fifa, it is also an empty concept."}],[{"start":144.8,"text":"I’m proud that we got Iran to play. Maybe I should have given the Fifa Peace Prize to myself? "}],[{"start":150.60000000000002,"text":"Our tickets are cheaper than those of any American sports play-off. The NBA play-offs do not feature the Democratic Republic of Congo vs Uzbekistan. "}],[{"start":160.60000000000002,"text":"Football unites everyone regardless of ability. Have you seen a video of me taking a corner?"}],[{"start":166.3,"text":"Shakira will take part in the first-ever World Cup final half-time show. At least admit that I’ve deterred Gerard Piqué from attending. "}],[{"start":174.3,"text":"A big thank you to the 44,985 fans at South Korea vs Czech Republic! Thank you to President Trump for his tips on counting crowd size."}],[{"start":184.45000000000002,"text":"If we do something wrong, probably everyone selling tickets in North America is doing something wrong. Everyone selling tickets in North America is doing something wrong."}],[{"start":195.3,"text":"Women’s football has so much potential still to be developed. One day they too will organise a tournament in extreme heat, and ban spectators from bringing bottles of water. "}],[{"start":205.95000000000002,"text":"Fifa is the official happiness provider for humanity. I can say anything with a straight face. Anything."}],[{"start":212.60000000000002,"text":"It’s time to celebrate the unifying power of football. I will soon be re-elected unopposed. "}],[{"start":219.10000000000002,"text":"We are studying the development of a Fifa crypto token. Did you ever imagine you’d feel nostalgic for Sepp Blatter?"}],[{"start":230.55,"text":""}]],"url":"https://audio.ftcn.net.cn/album/a_1781332063_4405.mp3"}

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